Love Your New Body
Great article had to share again ...so true
Stretched out, flabby, and fatigued is how many women would describe their bodies after childbirth. The added pounds and downright messiness of new motherhood leave many women feeling so unattractive that they're uncomfortable with the idea of merely taking off their clothes, never mind letting someone else touch their body. So how do you go from feeling like a baby factory to feeling like a sex goddess? Here are a few tips.
1. Don't compare yourself to Cindy Crawford. Or any other celebrity mom with a nanny and a full-time personal trainer for that matter. If you can accept your body just as it is, you may discover that sexuality is less about slinky dresses and more about having a powerful body that can do wonderful things, says Cathy Winks, coauthor of The Mother's Guide to Sex (Three Rivers Press).
Making this mental transformation takes time, because it flies in the face of the current societal ideal of women whose lips are bigger than their hips. But you can do it, especially if you look at other women in the mall, in the gym, and at the beach. The reality is that the average woman is a size 14, says Morgan, and that reality can be clear to you if you just open your eyes.
2. Put together an exercise program. Find one that's compatible with your new postpregnancy regime. Don't do this because you want to lose weight (though you might), but because regular exercise will boost your energy, confidence, and sexual health. As Foley points out, exercising is the closest thing we have to a fountain of youth. It helps our bodies maintain nutritional and hormonal balance. And it boosts our mood because it releases feel-good chemicals in the brain.
In fact, the sexual benefits of exercise may be as potent as the fat-burning ones. For instance, the physical flexibility that results from exercising also contributes greatly to the comfort and pleasure of sex with a partner, especially if you want to try more adventurous positions.
3. Believe your partner when he says you're sexy. Women are more likely than men to buy into the idea that skinny and young is the only way to be sexy, observes Foley. But the truth is that most men respond visually to a wide range of women. The majority of new dads will tell you that they found their wife as beautiful on the day they got home from the hospital as on the day they were married.
4. Take yourself for a test drive. To really understand and reinhabit your postpartum body, you should find some time for yourself in the bedroom, says Foley. Try undressing and touching your body all over. Use a hand mirror and your fingers to find out what feels overly sensitive to the touch and what feels good. Taking this little bit of time alone -- even just for two minutes a day -- will help you return to your body after this momentous event. This sort of private time is crucial to rediscovering your sexuality after motherhood, says Winks, because then you can show your partner how and where you enjoy being touched now. In fact, she goes one step further, suggesting that every new mom needs to figure out what makes her feel good before resuming sex.